Some time in 2012-2014 we came back from Cape Cod to Wilton and we just ran out of money again. This is always tough, because we have three children entering their school year, with all that entails given “back to school” expenses and needs. One thing specifically is registering for youth sports teams, which is always hundreds of dollars per child. Connor and Ryan played football, and Claire played field hockey in the fall. Both Bridgette and I coached their teams, but that doesn’t provide any discount or anything.
I was talking walks around our neighborhood and praying. Lord, we don’t have any money left, but need to get groceries and fuel. What is going on? What are you doing? What lesson do I need to learn?
Our neighborhood was built during the great depression, but the houses are quite grand. There was a famous architect and builder known as Fraizer Peters who designed and built many stone and tudor style homes. Famously, Patty Hearst (daughter and heir to Hearst publishing empire – who’s founder William Randolph Hearst famously said “Puff Graham” in 1949 and it helped the tent revivals explode in Los Angeles) owned the house across the street from us, which was a Fraizer Peters home built in the 1930s. It is quite a manor. I contemplated how our neighborhood did quite well during the recession. Like, maybe this was like a “Goshen” where people were provided for by God despite the economic situation nationally. This was also the period where the Merrit Parkway was
The pressure mounted. The prayers increased. I didn’t really have answers. In the past several years, every time Bridgette and I prayed, something would happen. Some one would send us a monetary gift, some other miracle would happen, a surprise check would be in the mail, people dropped off food just because. Someone being send down our driveway to plow it. Debts miraculously forgiven. So many miracles!
But now, nada. Crickets. Lord, what is happening? I knew from experience over the past several years not to get entirely discouraged at the lack of feedback or answers to my prayers.
The pressure was mounting. It was causing me to get creative. Lord, do you want me to speak with business and store owners I know to see if they would help us during our time of need? Or do you not want me to ask people for help? Recall, during our initial 2009 time of running out of money, I felt God was very clear with me – don’t ask people for money, I’m teaching you new ways of trusting me.
Obviously in talking about small businesses and owners I’m not talking about Wal-Mart, Costco or Stop and Shop. Those are publicly traded companies who’s managers generally speaking don’t have the authority to help people in the way I was considering.
What I was contemplating and praying about was like in the old days, what was known as
House Accounts
A house account is an old-school method of credit where people, say at a general store, would purchase items and put them “on their account”. Like a bar “tab” where by the amounts owed would be tallied at the end of the month, and then you could pay the “tab” off. Sometimes, if you were financially struggling, you would negotiate with the store a “payment plan” or quite simply ask the owner for grace to “pay you back” as soon as possible. For goodwill sake, often this would be a partial payment and then check back in next week, month, etc.
So, one of the first things we needed was gas in the trucks. Recall, at this point we had no credit cards. Just debit cards. But no money in the bank account. At $4 per gallon, with poor truck mileage (Bridgette drove a 2500 Suburban and me a 1500 Silverado pickup), this was a significant expense.
So, I knew a guy who was a Christian from the New Canaan Society who owned the a gas station up on the Post Road in the wealthy town of Westport. I prayed – Lord do you want me to reach out and ask if he could help us? How should I approach it? So, I felt led to ask him if we could fill our trucks with gas and “put it on account” that I would endeavor to pay him back as God made us able and provision came in. His response shocked me. He essentially said, I’d like to help you, but the gas station is set up to just accept credit cards. Don’t you have a credit card you can put it on and just pay that back? I responded, no. We don’t have credit cards anymore because our credit was destroyed and we pledged not to rely on credit cards anymore. I asked if he had any mechanism for a “house account” where we could settle up at the end of the month and see how everything was then. I was asking him to trust me to trust God that he would make a way to repay him. He said, no that’s not the way the systems work. That he had to pay the gasoline company directly and the only way was credit cards or cash. I was getting the impression, that he just didn’t want to deal with it. So, I thanked him and moved on. That door was shut. And it was instructive to understand the mindsets that even Christians hold when it comes to business, money, credit and finance.
My next inclination (and leading of the Spirit) was to work with our local gas station called “The Country Store” which was owned by a guy who I had become friendly with over the years. He was a Catholic believer who during Christmas time for example sold Christmas cards and other faith based items along with the usual convenience story staples. I had brought him business for about 15 years, buying gas, milk, sandwiches and the like.
I humbled myself and explained the situation. I said, would you be willing to open a house account with us so we can get the gas and basics we need today, and I will endeavor to pay you back as I am able. His response was immediate and wonderful. Hey, we all go through things. How would $200 worth of gas and groceries be to start? I was like – that’s great! Thank you. Then he said, and if you can never repay me, that’s ok. It was straight out of Jesus teachings – when you lend to someone don’t expect to be repaid and then your reward will be great (Luke 6:34).
Next, I was led to approach another business owner I knew and had done business with for over 10 years, and was the owner of a local IGA grocery store in the Cranbury neighborhood of Norwalk right near our house. Similar to the Country Store I shared our situation and need and asked if he would be willing to open a “house account” with us where we could buy groceries for our family today, and then later repay him and settle accounts on a regular basis. My promise was I’ll pay you back, I just don’t know when and how much. He shared in response that they no longer had house accounts because customers took advantage of them and didn’t repay. So they had abandoned the practice. That he used to do it, but no longer. I was once more surprised at his answer, thanked him for his time and consideration. But there I was, empty handed once more. Knowing we needed to eat.
I was a bit perplexed. What happened Lord? I thought you indicated he would help us? And so the Lord responded: “Ask him again.” I was like. Really? So the next day, I called him back and asked him again. Once more he said no. I was like OK Lord now what do I say. He said “ask him if he would personally do it – not through the store.” So I asked it like that and he said – OK listen, why don’t you stop by the store tomorrow and we’ll talk about it. Wow God, the door is cracked open here. So Bridgette and I prayed and I visited him in his office the next day. I shared with him I too was a small business owner, and that I was in a transition from running a hedge fund to trusting God for a new way of investing according to the scriptures. He listened. I explained my character, the business I had brought his store over the years, and my desire to repay him. We talked politics and faith a little bit. We got to know each other a little more. Then he said, alright what do you need?
I had asked Bridgette this very question the day before. If he says yes, what amount of groceries to we use a week? She said $200 a week would work for us and our family (our children were ages 14, 12, and 10 at the time).
Bridgette said $200 a week, so lets say 4 weeks worth. Would $800 work for you? He said, yes no problem. Then he proceeded to set up an account in the store just as I had originally asked for. The Lord had made a way. It was through relationship!
What’s amazing about both of these situations was God opened up the ability to repay both business in a very short amount of time. He was essentially drying up the well of provision as a way of Bridgette and I pressing in to trust Him greater. God put me into an uncomfortable and vulnerable position – for purpose. Because of his love. Because His ways are higher than my ways. To humble myself. To expose and share my weakness with others (of having no money at the time) as an opportunity for someone else to respond in generosity and compassion (enhancing our long time business relationship). For us both to trust God together.